2012? Bring it on.

I turned 25 yrs 3 months ago, with frankly not much to show for in the past year.

A year is a little long to be feeling a little lost and disconnected…I take comfort that this will not last forever. The upside to this is that in comparison, the new year is going to be an interesting one (in good way), and one that I will make resolutions for…something that I haven’t done in years. And different resolutions.

Not task-oriented ones that I usually make…like read the Bible in a year or pack my room every 2 week etc. Rather guiding principles that I hope will shape my worldview and who I am. The thought of change use to frighten me, but now...

At this point it feels like I’m at a crossroad...whether I want to continue holding on to the same expectations in understanding myself, others and how I’ve looked at the world, or embrace life from here and now with a more open mind and possibilities. My Source of strength, hope and faith has not changed…but I don’t want to live life backwards or looking back. While people my age are starting to live out the blueprints of their life they have already planned, it is rather refreshing to not know the blueprint of mine, and discover the choices and what else might be in store in the future, on a regular basis.

Here’s a note to self, on how 2012 will be different:

1. Be intentional

In the things I do, the people I meet and the issues to address. Be purposeful. This calls for a personal ministry plan, in keeping track of how often I meet who, remembering what has happening in their lives, have an idea of what we should be ‘covering’ when we meet, and be purposeful. If it’s just to be a listening ear, then just listen.

2. 100%

Be present to the present. So when I’m in something…be there, in both body and mind. If it’s training, put in my all. If it’s time with family, don’t split my attention and start texting. I am only given my parents for this brief period of time, and I should treasure them. Avoid ‘I should have’s! I also have a horrible habit of not listening, or being distracted when people are trying to tell me something. Asking people the right questions starts from listening…and then after understanding, connecting the dots (to their life stage, emotion etc.) and then (hopefully)…reading people!

3. Me

Don’t be everything to everybody, because you can’t. Focus on building your inner man, to be something to some people. What are the building blocks to strengthening the inner man? A song comes to mind…”Read the Bible, pray every day…pray every day. Read the Bible, pray everyday…and you’ll grow, Grow, GROW!” How simple.

Don’t pigeon hole myself. Discover and develop my own likes, dislikes, passion, gut instinct and opinions. I tend to fold others’ advice/opinions and adopt them as my own. Take them as reference and consideration and from now on, formulate my own first.

4. A mistake, is a mistake

But that’s life. Don’t be afraid to make a decision, worrying if it is a mistake. At least make it and move on from it.

5. Live life face-forward

“Life can only be understood backwards; but it must be lived forwards.” – Soren Kierkegaard, Danish philosopher (1813 - 1855). Let the past remain behind me, and live life face-forward…facing and not shying away from what may come my way. Whatever it is…I do not have to fear or worry it, for I know Who leads me.